Esperando a Sophia {Waiting on Sophia}

It is 12:32AM.  I’m sitting at my computer timing my contractions and trying to beat Sophia to the finish line.  What finish line you ask?  Well….the finish line where I breath, the finish line where I have no work pending, and the finish line where I prepare work for the next month or two while I take time off with my baby girl.  Looks like we are both so close that finish line!  Let’s see who wins.

I wanted to share some personal thoughts with you as a parent/entrepreneur.  I’ve worked through my business with all of my children (2 sons), but each were at very different stages of my career.  My first born was the one who inspired me to pick up a camera and capture ever single moment of every single day.  He was the one who caused me to step out in faith and believe that I can start making a little side money just to stay home with him.  My second child was sooooooooo hard.  My business had finally picked up and managing life with him and business was ridiculously tough.  I would cry most days from being so overwhelmed with the demands he brought on and the demands work brought on.  His hyperactive energy was at times too much to handle and even five minute breaks to Starbucks or a quick shower were luxury.  Somehow (and with the help and support of my mother in law) I made it through his first years and didn’t crash my business to the ground.

Here are some regrets I do have after having my second.  Regrets that I don’t want to repeat with Sophia.  I didn’t enjoy the first couple of years with him.  It was a struggle and it was tough!  I remember just hoping and praying he would be old enough to LISTEN and maybe change his stubborn ways until I had an epiphany when he turned 3.  I thought to myself “who am I doing this for?!”  “What am I trying to prove?”  “If my children are getting the bad end of me, am I winning?”  Obviously all of those questions brought me to my knees as I asked the Lord to help and guide me.  I asked him to give me patience.  Then just like that….He did.  I grew as a mother that day.  I understand that this life is but a midst and if my kids are not a priority then I needed to really rethink what I was doing.  I started to make life count.  Every single day I was more patient with my son.  Every single day I remembered that work could wait and it would be waiting for me even if it meant that I was staying up all night.  I was going to be present and patient and loving to my husband and my children.  I don’t want to repeat that cycle with Sophia and I’m absolutely thrilled that I am in a new mind frame going into this new season.  I am looking forward to enjoying every little moment that I have with her!

Here’s what to expect from me!  I’ve mapped things out so that I can be present in business-but 100% present with my family!  I look forward to showing you glimpses of my reality on insta stories.  I’m so excited to take a month off completely with Sophia and I have limited my end of the year schedule so that it doesn’t feel rushed and I can give my clients 100% and give my family 100%.  The exciting thing about those end of the year weddings is that after a month off, I’ll be DYING to get back out and shoot!  I’ll be motivated and passionate in another level because of the time off and rest.  Maybe I’ll be dying for a break from my crying baby…who knows! Lol.  I have no doubt that I will have days where I feel like crying.  I have no doubt that I’ll have several sleepless nights.  But honestly…..I can’t wait.  I look forward to all of it!  And when all else fails there’s always COFFEE right?!